When the sun went down yesterday, I breathed a sigh of relief. I was sitting in the truck in front of Walmart. After a few days of laying low at the house, Mr. FixIt was ready to get out and about a little bit. We drove to town and went to Kohl’s to get him a new belt. Then we went to our favorite diner for an early dinner. At 5:00, we drove to Walmart and the phone rang. I had a conference scheduled to discuss my brother’s care in Colorado. (He’s doing well, by the way. Just aging, as we all are.) As I was listening to his caregivers’ reports, two things happened. First, my daughter called and I had to let it go to voicemail. Then, Mr.FixIt said, “I’m going on in. I have my phone.” And off he went.
It was all I could do not to tell those on the line that I had to go. I took a deep breath and told myself, “He’s a grown man. He’s fine. You can’t (and SHOULDN’T) watch him every minute. Give it to God and mind your business.” I turned back to the call and when it was finished, I breathed a sigh of relief.
I called my daughter back. She got the job she wanted! Just seven minutes from home, and gives her an opportunity to learn new things working in horticulture. Plus, there are three “work cats” there. She’s pumped. My little introvert can snuggle kitties and make pretty things grow. Pretty perfect. I breathed a sigh of relief.
I moseyed on into Walmart and found Mr. FixIt pushing a cart up and down the aisles, shopping as usual. I stood at the end of the aisle, his back to me, and felt the tears sting the back of my eyes. “There he is. He’s fine. He’s doing what he does best…living and breathing. He’s ok.” I breathed a huge sigh of relief.
You often don’t realize how long you’ve been holding your breath till you let it go. I know I can’t control any of these things. And I know worrying about any of it is absolutely fruitless and not what I’m supposed to be doing. Yes…I’m a sister. And a mom. And a wife. How can I NOT have concerns? I offered up a quick prayer of thanksgiving, walked up to that sweet man of mine, and planted a big kiss on his still slightly numb lips and smiled.
“Did ya miss me?”
“Of course I missed you!”
***smile***
***sigh***
❤️
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
Romans 8:28 NIV
Romans 8:28 is my go to verse. I say it alot, I stop worrying, cause I know my God has it. Trust is a hard word, and action, sometimes. But we have to trust our God. He loves us and has a purpose for us, for His Glory. Praying for you both.
❤️
I can remember when my husband came home after triple by-pass surgery. I was scared to death to take care of him. Then I had a good talk with myself : Judy, you do this for a living-straighten up your act, I was a CNA–but it is a whole new ballgame when you are taking care of someone you love. I know how you are feeling.
❤️