The weather has been pretty dreary in Colorado. It has been grey and stormy just about every day since I left Missouri last week. It has left me in a dark mood that matches the skies above me. And when I go to that room inside, my thoughts follow and pretty soon there’s a conference going on that I have no business attending. My sparkle dims and I hate that. I know, intellectually, that there was absolutely nothing different when I wrote this. Every circumstance was exactly as it was a few hours before. The only thing different was my thoughts.

I was thinking about Mr. Virgo. I don’t usually let myself go there. It doesn’t serve much of a purpose other than to upset me. It’s not that he doesn’t enter my mind…he does. Several times a day. But I can usually let it go and get on with the matter at hand. It isn’t that easy when my heart is the color of the rain clouds…bruised and blue, heavy with rain in the form of tears. I think it’s because of my birthday coming up. Mr. Virgo always made my birthday a huge deal. And it’s just not the same without him.

The waves of grief still come when I least expect them. I just lean in and let them go past. It will be better soon.

❤

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

Romans 12:2