I met Nicole in one of the many hot springs pools lining the steppes at the river’s edge in Glenwood Springs. It was getting late and it was very cold…just a few days before Christmas. I had dinner earlier…alone…at the restaurant where Mr. Virgo and I were married. It was only the second time I visited Rivers Restaurant since his death and this one didn’t hurt as much. Nearly four years had passed and my life was on a new trajectory. I was healing.

I sat in the pool closest to the river and watched the lights from town reflecting on the ripples of the Colorado River. Muted conversations drifted around me on the swirls of steam rising from the healing waters. A woman’s voice interrupted my reverie.

“Do you mind if we join you?” A young couple in their late thirties stood at the water’s edge.

“No…please. Join me!”

Our conversation was easy and flowed from one topic to another as we enjoyed sitting under the stars…the cold air freezing a crown of glistening ice in our hair. God brings people together for reasons we cannot begin to understand and Nicole was my God appointment of the day. We shared contact info and soon were Facebook friends. I’ve never seen her again, but we bonded in our own way and I’ve enjoyed following her exploits over the years.

Last night, when I sat down to write this, I opened Facebook and there she was…in a wedding dress, on the arm of a dark and distinguished looking man. She attached a link to a New York Times article featuring their “how we fell in love during the pandemic” story. I loved seeing that serene smile on her face. The love in their eyes was palpable. I skimmed the article and came to their vows.

“I promise to love you for who you are…and who you are not.”

I sat for the longest time letting that roll around in my mind. What an interesting phrase to share at your wedding.The more I thought about it, the more I really got it. I can totally see what she meant by that. I love Mr. FixIt for who he is…his kind and gentle spirit, his quick wit and sense of adventure, his rock steady love for me. And, I love him for who he isn’t….all the traits I’ve lived with in relationships past that didn’t mesh with my own. He isn’t jealous, possessive, or impatient. There isn’t a mean bone in his body. I love him just as much for who he is not as I do for who he is.

I thought about the pandemic and the timeline of our relationship. I can’t imagine starting a new relationship in the midst of all the craziness of 2020. That being said, I can’t think of anyone I’d rather be holed up with than Mr. FixIt. This year has been intense…between the pandemic and two strokes and quarantine and staying home raising a garden and canning everything in sight and taking care of a little black cat and two farms….we’ve been stuck to each other like glue. 

I always took pride in the fact that Mr. Virgo and I never, ever raised our voices to each other. In my relationship with Mr. FixIt, I’ve realized maybe that wasn’t the healthiest thing. I held a lot in back then. I had a hefty fear of abandonment, especially after a painful divorce in 2000. I didn’t want to rock the boat. I needn’t worry about that with Mr. FixIt. We speak from the heart and sometimes have “vibrant discussions”. It’s by far the healthiest relationship I’ve ever had. And the most fun!

I love the circuitous route my life has taken, where it’s led me, and those whose path I’ve crossed…if only to read a story about love in the time of Covid. And getting to live my own.

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“You did not choose me. I chose you and sent you out to produce fruit, the kind of fruit that will last. Then my Father will give you whatever you ask for in my name. So I command you to love each other.”

John 15:16-17 CEV