Mr. FixIt had to run to town yesterday so I asked if he would mind picking up some groceries if I gave him a list. He was happy to oblige so that kept me from having to go to the grocery store. I was just gathering my things to head to the farm to mow when Beans texted. They were just getting ready to mow, so that was two for two! I was off the hook with the house to myself for a few hours.
Mr. FixIt checked the mail on his way to town and said I had a book in the mailbox and he would leave it there for me. I ran over to retrieve it then fixed my mug of RYZE. I settled in my Big Red Chair and cracked the book open. This is not going to be a fun read. My camping friend Jea Santovasco wrote it about her son, Jay Austin and the love of his life, Lauren. They were the two American cyclists murdered by terrorists in Tajikistan five years ago. The book started out as a personal journal to help her remember the details of what happened after her world stopped and changed her life forever.But after this time, she’s come to realize it may be of some assistance to other grieving parents, so she published it.
Jay was an extraordinary human being and had accomplished so much in his short life. I had actually heard of him before I met Jea as he had championed Tiny Home living. To perpetuate his work on environmental issues and sustainability, Jea started the Jay Austin Simply Be Kind Foundation so that he may be remembered. All proceeds from the sale of the book goes to support the foundation. While it is a painful read, it could be helpful to others who have lost a child to a violent crime. It isn’t a book for someone just starting the grief journey. Some time has to be spent experiencing your own grief before something like Jea’s book would be understood and helpful.
I would encourage you to order a copy. Jea hopes to sell enough books to plant a pollinator garden n Jay’s memory. I think we can do better than that! I’m already committed to dedicating one of my pollinator gardens here at Marshmallow Ranch to Jay’s memory. After you read of this extraordinary young man, I hope you’ll do the same. You can purchase the book here: My Stories Since The Death Of My Son Jay Austin: An American Murdered By Terrorists While Cycling The Globe
You can read a story about the attack from Radio Free Europe HERE.
It’s hard to imagine the horror Jea went through and continues to go through. On top of the loss of her son, she had the all too common experience of people she thought would always be there for her that just…weren’t. There were those who thought she should get over it. They thought she needed antidepressants, but she wasn’t depressed. She was sad. No one can fully understand another’s grief…no matter how many times they have experienced their own. The Jea I met camping at Blackwater Falls is gone and after just five short years, she still experiences the depth of her pain every day. Some would say this is complicated grief, but I think it’s more a mother’s broken heart that won’t be healed till they meet again someday. I’m just so grateful that she’s still here with us and I look forward to the day we can camp together again.
❤️?
“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
Psalms 34:18 NIV