Comments on: When You’re Gone

By: Ginny McKinney

Ginny McKinney — Thu, 23 Feb 2017 03:50:37 +0000

In reply to Mary Ann.

Mary Ann, that has always been my intent…to give Widows hope. The pain of early grief is nearly unbearable. But I’m here to tell you…so far my record for getting through the bad days is 100%. I’m still here and the sun will shine again. Keep looking! ❤️

By: Mary Ann

Mary Ann — Thu, 23 Feb 2017 02:17:59 +0000

I am still in that deep dark painful space that feels like you can never escape. I hate the dark and going to bed by myself. Your posts give voice to my pain and grief but they also give me hope that one day it will be better. Thank you.

By: Ginny McKinney

Ginny McKinney — Wed, 22 Feb 2017 18:41:33 +0000

In reply to Dawn Ostgaard.

Dawn…thank you for your insightful reply. What a lovely way of carrying forward the pickle analogy! I truly believe we can change from sour to sweet, just as we can change from sweet to sour. I, too, went through divorce…twice…and it changes you tremendously. Time heals amost wounds and what it doesn’t heal, it certainly can soften. We all have scars but without the battle, how can we know peace? Thank you for recommending me to others. Divorce creates a grief all its own and we can all benefit from the “group therapy” of the written word. ❤️

By: Linda

Linda — Wed, 22 Feb 2017 15:46:08 +0000

Yesterday was my husbands first Heavenly Birthday…I was dreading it. But, I got through it with some tears, but also some smiles. I wrote him a poem, as I did last year….When I think of his larger then life personality I can’t help but smile…..we ‘talked’ last night as we always do and then I slept…….still wrapping my mind around the word widow….I know thats what I am, but I’m still his wife…..

By: Dawn Ostgaard

Dawn Ostgaard — Wed, 22 Feb 2017 15:06:26 +0000

Ginny, Thank you for sharing your experiences. Not to make light of this subject or the deep feelings experienced and expressed but the thing that resonates with me was “Once a pickle, always a pickle. You don’t get to go back to being a fresh cucumber.” This made me chuckle! Although my life experience is in a different phase- to quote artist Tracy Chapman ” I’m the widow of a living man” Divorced after 28 years, never expected to be.
Your statement has made me recall watching my grandmothers make their own versions of pickles some sour (dill & garlic) and some sweet (sugary). WOW it hit me…it’s the Spices added that made the difference! True to your inspiring way it’s got me to thinking – can a pickle of a person go from a sour dill to a sweet gerkin… Maybe it’s time for me to add some new spices.

I do enjoy following your journey and have a few friends that I’ve recommended your blog to as they are traveling a similar path as widows and your insights help make the journey a little lighter and not so solitary. Thanks for letting me tag along. ~Dawn

By: Ginny McKinney

Ginny McKinney — Wed, 22 Feb 2017 13:04:56 +0000

In reply to Pam Hanson. It always helps knowing there are others who feel the same and I'm not alone. There is deep magic in that. Thank you, Pam! ❤️

By: Pam Hanson

Pam Hanson — Wed, 22 Feb 2017 11:18:41 +0000

This post touched me deeply. I struggled so much during the first couple of years after TB died. I felt had lost my identity..I had been a wife, a caregiver, a Mom. Who was I now? It took me awhile to accept widow.

I met someone and fell in love and remarried. A wonderful man who helped me see that life really does go on. I really could love again. But I will always be TB’s widow. I could never deny that large part of my life.