I’m pretty far into the book of my life. There were so many things I wished I could change…do differently…start over. However, we can’t rewrite history. Those earlier chapters are written in stone, man. What I CAN do is craft a new ending by keeping God front and center in my life, and by. Putting more weight onto the right side of the scale.
I’ve changed more than I could ever imagined. I abused alcohol, prescription drugs, food, money, people for far too many years. When the bottom fell out and I found myself alone and my husband moving on without me, I thought it was the end of my life. Getting to the other side of of all that darkness seemed insurmountable. But, it’s just like eating an elephant. You have to take one bite at a time. It took me losing everything to realize this.
I worked hard to gain back the trust of those I hurt most…my family. It wasn’t easy. It took years of therapy and a lot of tears, apologies, and demonstrations of change to make things better between us. To be honest, I don’t think we’ll ever get back to the way we were before I “dropped my bracket.” That’s ok. There was far too much dysfunction in our previous relationships. The only thing to do was rebuild on a solid foundation. That happened after I sought out Jesus to help me.
I’m looking forward to my trip in July and seeing my Colorado family. I am o grateful for the opportunity to spend time with them right where we stand today. Not decades ago when I was THAT person. Sometimes we are handed a do-over card…a chance to make things right and love the way God intended me to.
I praise him for these gifts every day.
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““But forget all that— it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.” Isaiah 43:18-19 NLT
***Gratitude Journal*** Today, I am thankful for do-overs and the opportunity to try to make things right with those I love and who love me.